We recently returned from a visit to my family, who are all really lovely people. However, when I look at what I have I see a huge gaping whole between that and what they have. I was just sweeping the kitchen floor in our little, old, handmade wooden home nestled in a remote bush location and I thought... geee, it would take so much effort to get from where I am to where they are, materially.
The reason I am not where they are is because I have set (consciously and subconsciously) different goals to them.
I've realised it is so important for mental health to set goals that suit your path, that can be fueled by your interests and endeavour... not goals that more or less force you to be someone you are not.
"Be sure your goals reflect who you are and what you want to be,
not what you think you ought to be. It's how you will succeed."
This morning I read an article in an Australian permaculture magazine, it was as story on a self-reliant family in rural Victoria. They have no rubbish bin, really, no rubbish bin. I thought that was AMAZING! It seems like such a small thing, but can you imagine having no need for a rubbish bin?
It is certainly one of our goals.
I look around my life and see that indeed I have met some great goals. I have achieved what matters to me, what inspires me. In fact, our whole living is filled to almost capacity with projects that take us further towards a self-reliant life.
Our goals are to ungrip from the system, to rely on it less and less. For our food, for our health for the education of our child. We also put energy into building connections with our local community, with friends and with God. We have unspoken goals of daily meditation, cooking all our food from scratch ... we do this now, our goal is to continue with it and to help others learn how to too.
That's what these blogs are about. Giving back. Sharing and inspiring.
So the gap between where we are 'at' and where members of my family are 'at' is big. It would take an incredible amount of hard work to achieve what they have achieved. But it doesn't matter because I don't need to achieve those things. I need to achieve what I need to achieve. It would take them an incredible amount of hard work to achieve what we have achieved. Peaceful hearts and simple living takes a great deal of work and sacrifice too.
What are your goals? What have you achieved in your life? You may not be able to sit in meditation for a few hours at a stretch, you may not own a brand new car? You may always have time for others or you may have no time for others because you are focussed on getting things done. It doesn't matter.
What matters is that you are able to look around you and know that what you see is a reflection of where you are 'at'. I see wonderful friendships, big gardens, a happy husband and baby, animals, art on the walls, and wood fired meals.
If you look at your life you will see that you have achieved something too. It may not be what someone else has achieved, but that's alright.
Look at your own life and don't compare your goals to the goals of others because that is super stressful and disempowers us.